Big Love

So the summer wasn't ALL THAT bad; we spent a couple of weeks at my parents' house in Connecticut with my sisters and all 8 cousins. Of course, after all my chatter to the girls about how cool it gets at night and how they needed to pack their fleeces, we arrived in the middle of the most oppressive heat wave I can remember in 27 summers there. "I thought you said it was going to be chilly." Sumner said to me wearing her new fleece in the 95 degree heat as sweat poured down her temples. When I suggested she remove her fleece she insisted on wearing it a.) because it was new b.) because I told her it was going to be chilly. At least she listened...

So here we are and for the first time it occurred to me on about my second day there as I walked in the house and paused as I glimpsed at a plaque that has always been hung by the back door that said, "On this site in 1897, nothing happened." Ha ha...except, at this house, there's always something happening. This house is the house where everyone with little kids loves to come and play because they know they will find the "Action." This house is the one that always has the yummy food, and there's generally a freshly baked cake from scratch sitting on the counter.





Within 24 hours of my arrival I had climbed a tree in pursuit of half the cousins, witnessed a mud fight, a pie eating contest, a ping pong tournament, watched a homemade Fashion show complete with towels strewn across the yard for a runway. Is there anything better than this? Where else would there be a pool party virtually every day, celebrations at the dinner table, and dance parties after dinner?





And it got me thinking that there's something to this "It takes a village" idea as my sisters and I traded off kids. I think maybe I need a wife...one of my kids is bugging me, so we trade. Meals are cooperative, with me generally distracting all the cousins so the other grown ups can have free reign in the kitchen to get the meal on the table. It's co-parenting at it's best. It helps that we have 4 big kids and 4 little kids, so they are usually divided between the bigs and littles or girls and boys. My stay at my parents' house got me thinking about how great it would be to live close to my sisters do...and I think that was why it was so hard when I got home. At the beach there was always someone to talk to..those people on Big Love might just have a good idea (except for the sharing a husband part.)

But isn't it amazing how we go home to our parents and immediately revert to our familial roles, no matter how old we are? So it was not surprising that about a week into the visit the sibling rivalry began. I had talked before about my parents asking us to make a list of 10 big things we want from their house in Connecticut so they can start giving us their paintings, furniture etc...so I make my list while I'm there, carefully considering what my sisters might want and trying not to be too demanding blah blah blah...

So at the top of my list was a painting that hangs in the foyer that I have loved for years. When I tell my Dad its on my list he responds with a quick, "Oh, Chis wants that..." Um, excuse me? My brother-in-law??? Yes, he is a true brother to and he's been in my life, listened to me and harassed me like an actual brother for almost 20 years...So I was furious (not truly, because I do realize these things are just things,..." but still. So I force my Dad away from his computer to help me get the painting off the wall when the house was empty and without another word said about it, I hid it in the attic.

It didn't take long for Chis to notice the missing painting and figure out what had happened. The next morning when I went to call Elliot, I realized that my cell phone was missing. I searched EVERYWHERE for the damn thing and as I storm through the house I hear my brother-in-law, not even looking away from the television, say, "I'll give you the phone back when the painting is back on the wall." And there you have it. So this went on for almost THREE days, until finally I could take it no longer and waved the white flag.

Well, whoever thinks our children don't watch and learn is sorely mistaken, as later that week, I woke before six one morning to Sumner standing over me, curly moustache drawn on her face; when I opened my eyes she said, "Who did this???" I gotta hand it to her, I generally expect her to not be a great sport, as she has a hard time laughing at herself, but she fought a smile because she knew just how funny it was. Her twin's punishment? She had to sit still as a stone while her sister drew a biker stache on her...

I guess I hadn't set the best example. I went in the girls bathroom recently and found that someone had written,"Marshall, you stink" ON the toilet paper roll. And so it goes on...but this kind of messing around seems harmless enough, right? Isn't it everyone's sisterly instinct to bug and pester 'till you hit your absolute limit. After your sister says, "Don't touch me." doesn't everyone get their finger as close to her arm as possible and say "I'm not touching you..." in a sing-songey voice even at age 35? Don't we all give extra bear hugs to our siblings who don't like to be touched and eat our corn on the cob extra loud next to those family members known to hate, "Eating noises." It could always be worse...at least they're keeping it interesting, and this rivalry seems to be universal...

So I came back to Charlotte and my house, which once seemed so crazy, was eerily quiet. That is, until the newness of being home wore off, and I went upstairs to find Goldfish crackers under CeCe's pillow and her piggy bank full of cheese- go figure...